Stress, Not Caused by Circumstance

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“I am under stress because of my……”, fill in the blank with a deadline, project, boss, kids, and etc. Most of us believe that circumstance or other people’s behavior determines our feelings is an undeniable fact. We feel victimized by situations beyond our control. It is true what happens to us is often outside of our control, but how we respond emotionally is within our control – 100%, except most people don’t know how.

If this idea is too much to digest, think about the following situations. Two people watch the same movie and have different emotional reactions. Two people experience the same setback – not able to continue their professions due to disability, but one goes into depression and another reinvents herself and becomes more successful. One person loved his job initially but finds it boring after working on the same job for several years. Same circumstance in each case, the only difference is their thoughts.

We falsely believe how we feel is caused by outside circumstance or other people’s behaviors. In fact, our feelings have no clue about the outside world. It reacts to one thing and one thing only – our thought. In other words, it is not circumstance but our thoughts about the circumstance that affect our feelings. The thought is created in our mind and can be unfocused or changed instantly, with practice. This is completely under our control.

Some might ask, “how can I change my thought. The truth is the truth. I can’t lie to myself”. The real truth is that our perceived “truth” is only one perspective. As we often say, glass can be half full or half empty. Take public speaking as an example, we fear because we anticipate the potential failure. That possibility is created in our mind. It is not a reality. We can replace it with the thought of standing ovation, which is equally possible.

Our life quality is determined by the quality of our thoughts. Yes, no doubt. This means we are victims of circumstance only when we think we are. We are creators of our lives when we choose thoughts consciously and supportively. Many people understand this in concept but few people know how to live it moment by moment.

With a deep understanding of this principle and practicing mindfulness of our thoughts, we can reduce or eliminate work-related stress, fear of public speaking, depression or addictions and the list goes on. This serves as a Thought and Emotion Detox. When more emotional energy is freed from suffering and distress, we access increased mental clarity, inner peace and spiritual intelligence. This leads to a surge of creativity and productivity and can profoundly change relationships with ourselves, others and circumstances.

This is only a glimpse and there is more depth and implications to this principle which takes some explanation and hands-on exercises to fully appreciate its incredible power. It takes awareness and deliberate choice of thoughts over time to see the impact. But once experienced, it is truly life-changing. It certainly has changed my life and hundreds of thousands of those who embraced it. Applied at work, our business clients have realized millions of cost savings, increased revenue and improved work relationships.

The power of creating profound changes in our life is in our own hands. Problem-solving can be much simpler if we focus on conditions of wellbeing and root cause elimination. The world of possibilities is beyond our imagination. The only barrier to realizing them is our limiting beliefs, which are nothing but…..thoughts.

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